I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General

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by Jim L. Baird

I am the very model of a modern evil scientist,
I've secret hideouts, army minions, my own government lobbyist.
I operant condition, and dissect what's demological,
to further evil schemes. (See, it's really all quite logical!)
I give my boys some pills, they make them strong and quite obediant,
They capture demons, kill them too. (whatever seems expediant)
In 314 I hatch the plot that's got the demons petrified -
When Adam walks my plans and schemes will all have been

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